THANKS WASHINGTON

I sure am glad that Washington is doing all it can to help all of us struggling folks.  Without them, well, many of us would be tanking right now.  And with all those guys up there, burning the midnight oil, and working hours and hours on end for all of us kind of makes life seem a little easier somehow.  Just the other night, after I got home from working my second part-time job, and after working twelve hours straight for eight-dollars an hour, I turned on the television.  It kind of warmed my heart to see that our government representatives were willing and prepared to take a vote of some sort around eleven o’clock that night.  Of course, the vote never happened.  But, by God, those guys were willing to work late, too.  And after working all those late hours, man they looked refreshed and well groomed.  I admire folks like that.

Frankly, they’ve inspired me.  I am hanging in there with hope.  And hoping the change I have in my pocket will get me to my next job interview.  But because of those hard working Washington folks, I am staying positive.  Very positive.  Thanks to those guys, I can see the silver lining in things.

All the light bulbs in my house have burned out.  But that’s okay.  They cut my power off a week ago.

The price of gas is so high, I can’t afford to drive anywhere.  But that’s okay.  My old car lost its transmission just yesterday.

I can’t afford detergent to wash my work clothes.  But that’s okay.  I lost my job an hour ago.  Both of ‘em.

The stock market is crashing.  But that’s okay.  Well.  I guess you know why that doesn’t matter much to me.

My cholesterol level is extremely high.  And that’s okay, too.  Watered down ketchup and soda crackers don’t add that much LDL.

I used to worry when I didn’t hear back from the dozens of resumes I send out daily.  I don’t worry so much anymore.  My phone was disconnected 3 minutes ago.

And I will not seek out government help to see me through all of this.  Because I know just how much those Washington guys are trying to get our country running on its own again.  I know that before you know it  those guys are going to get folks to start hiring and paying again.

So, you see, I am being very positive.  I am hanging onto that promised hope.  Those Washington guys have my best interests at heart.  I know they do.  They worked such long and hard hours these past few weeks, there can be no doubt that they want good things to happen for me and others.  And, by God, to show them how much I appreciate their efforts, I am stating, here and now, that I am more than willing to take a few more bullets for those guys.  We all have to sacrifice, right?  I will happily endure a second, and even third, recession.  If that’s what it takes.  Y’all just let me know what y’all need from me.  But don’t mail that information.

The sheriff is padlocking my home and mailbox even as I type.  Maybe some skywriting over the homeless shelter would work.

Keep up the grand work, Washington.  I promise I won’t totally tank until you tell me there is no hope left.  Deal?

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